Well, I do cook, occasionally.

Fry Yaki-soba noodle with scallop.

My first time spending more than 20 mins preparing lunch for myself since probably 2002.

It tastes as good as it looks. :)

In the waiting line.

too close as a safe distance
too far apart to jump over

photo by sitruc. 2006, hk

i am me.

It was 1998 back then. Stood alone in faculty office, I was fascinated by a piece of writing hanged on the wall. For 30 mins I stared at it, lifted my mind up above the ceiling.

The very next day having coffee in the faceless crowd at cafeteria, the plain sentences and simple words still grabbed all of me. It wasn't as easy as it is now to search for articles via the internet. So I went to the faculty office again to write it down on my notebook disregarding the curious pairs of eyes:

i am me - "My Declaration of Self-esteem"
by Virginia Satir

In all the world, there is no one else exactly like me -
everything that comes out of me is authentically mine,
because I alone choose it -
I own everything about me -
my body, my feelings, my mouth, my voice, all my actions,
whether they be to others or to myself -
I own my fantasies, my dreams, my hopes, my fears -
I own all my triumphs and successes, all my failures and mistakes.

Because I own all of me, I can become intimately acquainted with me -
by so doing I can love me and be friendly with me in all my parts -
I know there are aspects about myself that puzzle me,
and other aspects that I do not know -
but as long as I am friendly and loving to myself,
I can courageously and hopefully look for solutions to the puzzles and for ways to find out more about me -
However I look and sound, whatever I say and do, and whatever I think and feel at a given moment in time is authentically me -
If later some parts of how I looked, sounded, thought and felt turned out to be unfitting, I can discard that which I feel is unfitting, keep the rest, and invent something new for that which I discarded -
I can see, hear, feel, think, say, and do. I have the tools to survive, to be close to others, to be productive, and to make sense and order out of the world of people and things outside of me -
I own me, and therefore I can engineer me -
I am me &

I AM OKAY

photo by sitruc, 2006, seoul, korea

1120 to the power of two.

your theory does not square with the facts,
nor your wish with the desires.


graphic by sitruc, 2006

Peter Pan's blue.

he rather not to fly when again found that's vanity in a dream,
afterall,
like every another day.

the kind of pain he never can get numb to.


photo by sitruc, 2001, andong, korea

God forgot to give a soul.

catches first ray of daylight just for him a crack on the wall looms a handsome smile blinks bleary eyes blatantly sends forth an unadorned innuendo to the landlady of porcelaneous skin right. flawlessly spotlessly she is a doll rolled out from an assembly line

A little black tale.

of my recent visit / purchase in yygallery, 5cm, Gay Giano, Cour Carre, 01TheOne, ScaredCow, Twentyuntil.

Bake me a morning muffin.

New photographic work, "Bake me a Morning Muffin" released. Check out here:
http://sitruc.kachaa.com/index.php?albumCode=44009

I shot it rather different this time. Follow our (model Samantha & me) inclinations, relax, and press the button.

You can almost smell it.
The aroma of Sunday in our coffee.


P.S. My first time do the hair for model. ah, it's fun. :)

Sitrucian I.Q. Test.

Check the device (my new watch). Figure out how it works.

Time: 15:29
Date: 10/21

I advice you to take a mensa test if you can solve it in 15 secs.

Hostage to all the yesterdays.

I have learnt so much from this world

that
I can no longer be myself.


photo by sitruc. 2006, hk

L'art de fleur.

A new startling discovery I made, that the mess on my home desk and flower arranging art are kindred tribes. Definitely it helps rationalize my hesitancy to tidy up.

Oui! Who's in the room cruel enough to ruin the artwork!

This exhibition will last till any given Sunday afternoon with nothing better to do than to pick up my room.

Admission's free. Enjoy.

Option C.

New stack of CDs, movies and books purchased remind me of her question:

48 hrs a day (a) or 7 hands and 8 legs (b)?

My choice is c. 36 hrs a day + dual-core brains. Surely a better deal.

btw, I was pleasantly surprised by the mooncake comes with CDs and magazines. HMV mooncake! So they feed not only your brain and soul but your stomach as well. lovely.

P.S. May your lack of T and R begone soon, dear friend.

Play the soft songs loud.

Got Ms. L's flash gramophone script deployed. See it on the left, slide across the items, sweet motion, huh? :)

My preference to music has changed a lot over the past few years. Once I loved frantic brand sound, electronic compliations, R&B and so. Now have a fondness to those more gentle and smooth. Triggered by, more or less, the first vocal jazz album I bought. [At the Movies] by Nat King Cole. The man who veritably defined modern jazz. And probably in most of the jazz songs we listen nowadays are influenced by this very man in some ways.

His songs as the main course, served with dim light and scotch whisky. A night would then be so much more than a night.

Now bring the light down, off the screen, raise the speaker volume and stay for a while.

Bonne nuit.

Hana & Alice.

*images adopted from the movie Hana & Alice


在陽光下跳著芭蕾舞的她
美得冒泡
岩井俊二系的泡

如果我在日本
如果現在是四月
如果今天要上學
我會繞一條比較遠的路看一下花


[Hana & Alice by Shunji Iwai, 2004]

Sabbath from decency.

Today I woke with an impulse to skip dressing decent. So I put on my jeans & tee to work, switched the Billie Holiday playlist to Love Psychedelico, clued a skyscraper hairstyle and sprayed too much perfume which choked myself a bit.

It feels like being 20. The age, the stage, I practically skipped.

Probably I'm too different to be recognized by my office PC that it refused to work properly for the whole day. Ergo I had to get it replaced at last.

As if it's.

who cares about the aimless loop of déjà vu in overrated reality like screaming bubbles, like ignis fatuus, fade for who they are before elusive sunray comes out of it's exile, the incomplete night completes me

Light it up. Bring it down. Nice, fab.

for the lamp underneath
the leaf glows

Backstage.

and the model's doing her face













and she's massaging her mouth














and she's starring at the photographer's bare foot













and she couldn't hold her laugh













and the rubber band couldn't hold her hair

and it's a splendid shooting. BTW, I'm starting to think horoscope maybe is more than hot air for the increbible similitude bewteen Model Samantha and Photographer Sitruc, who have the same birthday.

PS: I like the perfumed pillow puts me to sleep
MS: Me too!

MS: My fellows at home are used to me as a trouble & choosy bastard
PS: Me too!

PS: I think it's your great anxiety to feel like getting stuck or moving downhill regardless of the absolute status or intrinsic value at all. Just like how I feel.
MS: (nod nod)

MS: This is right for her! Bjork's just act...
MS & PS:...freaky!

Toast for the spoiled kids born on 01/01!

Day in day out.

the morning breaks she wakes watching the clock telling the same time all these years she wonders was she dreaming she was a girl or a girl dreaming she was a woman proceeds to the kitchen cracks the shell on rim 16 seconds on the pan she knows precisely it takes to get the halfcooked egg yolk another daybreak just like that

Homed at 12.

A regular day with

1 meeting
13 emails sent
19 designer applications received
1 award call for entry
2 panadols
1 coke
1 iced tea
1/2 mooncake
1 printer break down
3 phone calls from 2 ex
2 sms from mum
1 wedding ceremony invitation

and it's good for it's regular.

Answers from a bicycle.

(Follow-up post of "Mrs. Charon Pluto", pls check below)

I'm overwhelmed. By msn & icq msgs from you guys about the Charon Pluto post. Never expected so many of you would check my blog in these days after couple of months in idle.

Q&A session:

Q:xx xxx xxxx xxx xxx xxxxx xxxxx xxxx xxxx xxxxx?
A:A fish surely doesn't need a bicycle. And yes, both men and women, in my opinion, can each lives a good life without the counterpart (possibly maybe kinda true). Instead a man wants a woman and vice versa as we always want thing we don't actually need. That notion of need is a desire, thus.

Q:xxxx xx xxxx xxxxxx xxxxx?
A:Charon is the moon of Pluto the no longer planet, I used their relation to liken the moon-earth system to liken the woman-man relation, in turn. BTW, Charon is also referred to as Pluto I. That really sounds like Mrs. Pluto.

Q:xxx xxx xxxxx x xxxxx xxxx xxx xxxxx xxxxx xxx xxxx?
A:It's gonna take like a 1,000 words to explain my thoughts behind it. In short, moon is constantly orbiting the Earth while influencing everything on Earth from a distance without interfering where and how the man tracks. She even has the faith to give more room to the man, another 3.8 centimeters a year.

Q:xx xxx xxxx xxxxx xxx xxxxxxxxxxx xx xxx?
A:Don't get me wrong. I didn't mean that. Afterall there's only one moon for the Earth. And it's not trivial for you put only you eyes on it when you look up to the sky.

Q:xx xxx xxxx xxxxx xxxxx xxxxx xx?
A:No. The moon was around 20,000 kilometers away from the Earth at the very beginning. So it’s moved 430,000 kilometers in the the speed of 3.8 centimeters per year.

Q:xxx xxx xxxx xxxx xxxxx?
A:Because I read. lol.

Mrs. Charon Pluto.

"A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle" Irina Dunn, 1970

and a man needs a woman like the earth needs the moon. Who stays 450,000 kilometers away from you, moving further 3.8 centimeters a year.

____ is a four-letter word.

Dedicate to Jasper, the very charming model of the shooting. New photographic work, "____ is a four-letter word" released. Check out here: http://sitruc.kachaa.com/index.php?albumCode=20264

We had a great time. It was fun to create with concordant minds. I couldn't ask for more except time didn't allow us to actualize everything.

The whole thing will be close to complete when the viewers (you!) see the images and draw your very own interpretation of the title. Ergo, please share with me the four-letter word(s) to you the images conveyed by comment here or email and I'll reveal mine in the course of shooting.

Come on, throw it!

Flipping my album and noticed that I'm getting more and more captivated by the beauty of a grotesque human psyche, vis-à-vis, concomitant conflict.

It doesn't really matter if.

slightly grim patiently beneath this suffer the glow swallowed uttered the boy's sigh undo cord sixth finger torn hyponotized into bare sleephood stays aroused in hibernation minute by minute drop by drop exhaling a tree of oxygen 130 vessels away from torn he has to be told that he is okay he is okay he is okay you are okay you are okay I am okay okay.

That's all it takes.

For I can't remember how many times, I re-watched Happy Together in another sleepless night.

and they started dancing in the kitchen, my favourite scene of the movie. Lai Yiu-fai and Ho Po-wing were having the time of their lives. It takes only 2 persons in love and something stupid to do. Like,

Read you my favourite line of the book,
Hum you the lullaby learned from my mum,
Refer to the recipe to bake a cake,
Play a guitar-piano ensemble,
Try every combination of homemade cocktails,
Re-watch Happy Together together in sleepless night.

Will make my day.

[Happy Together by Kar Wai WONG, 1997]

Spooky action at a distance.

A quantum mechanical phenomenon caught my attention when I was reading Einstein's work.

Two photons once undergone the same particle interaction remain quantum entangled with each other, that is, making identical decisions on pathways to choose among at the same instant in time. It happens even when they are miles or light-years apart.

This "Quantum Entanglement" is beyond the explanation of quantum mechanics since nothing travels faster than light so there shouldn't be any possible mean of communication between the photons (e.g. insufficient time to send message across the distance to act instantly the same).

Don't you find this phenomenon immensely romantic? Connections beyond reason take effect in particles surely transpire to us. (No wonder the intellectually charming yet emotionally deprived Einstein dislike this theory and derided entanglement as "spooky action at a distance.")

Generalized it grounds my thought that there are mutual influences, we may notice or we may not, between lovers, lovers-to-be, family, friends, people you know, don't know, passed by, will meet. And yes, when I meet the one, I should know about it. The particles tell me so.

Zara Gala.

Sweaters & Slippers from Zara. Woohaawoohaaaa!

Happy Birthday Willie.

I was reminded it was William Shakespeare's birthday a few days back. The man lives across centuries after his death. May the beautiful beautiful lines cudgel thy mind, touch thy soul, now and then.

"And since you know you cannot see yourself,so well as by reflection, I, your glass,will modestly discover to yourself,that of yourself which you yet know not of. "

"The very substance of the ambitious is merely the shadow of a dream."

"I must be cruel only to be kind;Thus bad begins, and worse remains behind. "

"Being born is like being kidnapped. And then sold into slavery."

"Love all, trust a few, do wrong to none."

"I pray you bear me henceforth from the noise and rumour of the field, where I may think the remnant of my thoughts in peace, and part of this body and my soul with contemplation and devout desires."

P.S. Happy Birthday, Mr. N. Will you ever seen this? Ms. L will have the answer. Wish you all the best and may your beautiful algorithm rock the world. lol.

Ball fell to the another side.

Tonight it turned out I got as wet as the kissing scene in Match Point,
with no one to kiss with.

[Match Point by Woody Allen, 2006, http://www.matchpoint.dreamworks.com]

The forgotten ones tell her of my being.

please remember me, like words at the tip of your tongue, numbers on watch forgotten when you glance at the time, plain dress you used to wear at very bottom of the left-hand drawer. they cease so you can remember me.

Called off the first shopping day this season with...

BnW I gonna be in this summer it seems.

Sweater from Zara Homme.
Tee from tH Homme.
Sneaker from Puma.

Nice appetizer. But I still want a pair of nice slippers badly to kick-off the devilish summer. BTW, as per requested, someone's gotta be responibile for every purchase. In this case, Tenka digged the sweater, tee's on Sitruc's tab and the sneaker is a join venture of the two. hmm, sorry, Ignat, others don't like your call, yes, they said you got bad taste so to speak.

Tenka v.s. Sitruc v.s. Ignat v.s. Curtis v.s. the host.

某個二月天我寫著,

「這場眾靈魂佔據軀殼的競爭中,某個我尤其不喜歡的傢伙漸漸領先了‧作為宿主,應該慎重考慮如何作弊‧」

一下子另一個睡著的被吵醒,又熱鬧起來‧如果你明白的話,你會明白,深愛自己不喜歡的思維構成,一如羈伴‧其實結果你不會明白‧

斯斯然的遲來了一年‧今天覺得477這個數字有點可愛‧

The beautiful noise stops me from working.

It's different. There are people who step on the platform preen and the world adores. And there are records which dance on the CD player then you are beckoned.

Now you know you like music of every kind when it's good.

Like this one.

[Adult Pour Femme by Tokyo Incidients, 2006]

69Cal

I took a sip of chocolate milk.
And I'm happy again.